Mazzy and I have a morning routine. Well, I have one, she kinda goes along with it. I usually wake up, but not get up. I’ll lay in bed fighting against the morning wondering if I can fall asleep again. Usually the morning wins and I resign to it ever so slowly. My step towards getting up is usually some phone screen time with the news (The Daily Beast Cheat Sheet for some quick catchup).
I will then get up, put on whatever clothes that are in the pile at my feet, visit the toilet, then brush my teeth. I did exactly that today. Then I walked down the hallway and opened some window shades as I headed towards coffee. Today, Mazzy stopped me for food before I got to coffee. She did it by encompassing the entire area where her food closet is and stared at me like she was about to maul. Most days she trots out from the bedroom when I am in the middle of making coffee and stares at me with a not so subtle head swing towards her food closet. I feed her, then she goes outside to bomb the yard.
I find my routine quite boring most days, but it also has a comforting quality that I like- it also allows me not to have to think too much before my mind actually wakes up. As I finally got to making my coffee today, my mind began to wander into the future on what sort of routine, or lack of routine I may be in for. As I poured hot water over the grounds I realized that coffee might not necessarily be one of the first things I do. I most likely will already have been up for two hours- or three or four. I may have to begin using pre-ground coffee as not to wake Scout if he/she is napping.
I believe we will have a routine, and I will learn it. It won’t be my routine, it will be me adapting to Scout’s routine. And it will gradually change week by week I’m sure. I can only imagine what it may may be like. I realize at first I’ll be up for diaper changes and feedings. That will evolve into face time and reading. Then real time watching because Scout will be rolling and crawling. Then I’ll be getting up to chase Scout around. Soon enough I’ll be getting Scout ready for school. So weird to think about considering my immediate situation.
I’m sitting here in a pair of ratty sweats, a soft orange sweater that I bought at Target for $3, and a cozy pair of slippers on my feet. I still have a half cup of warm coffee sitting at my left hand and the last thing I feel like doing is going outside into the cool autumn morning and doing some yard work.
I say that because as I’ve been writing this post I’ve been looking up and taking occasional glances out the window. The whole time, my neighbor has been mowing and blowing fallen leaves. He’s a dad. He has two or three kids (I’m really not sure) around the ages from five to eleven (+-6 years). It just makes me wonder, am I going to have that “dad drive” to take care of things outside before it gets warm? Will being a dad automatically trigger a switch in me that makes me hate fallen leaves and long grass so much that I don’t mind going outside early to take care of it? I can see it being something I have to do for lack of time- but his kids already went off to school for the day. He could be having some coffee and writing in his blog right now too- at least he wouldn’t be making me feel bad for doing it.
Damn, he’s really getting after it too. He went from mower, to blower, and now back to mower. Go Peter.
I glance from his yard to mine. I wouldn’t say my grass is long, but it’s not tight- I’m hoping I mowed for the last time this season. There is a light amount of leaves strewn about- it’s good for the grass I say. The hammock stand is still up even though it hasn’t been used in weeks. I see a couple Mazzy bombs out there waiting for my attention. There is a flamingo that got knocked over by the wind as well as a billion marble-sized crab apples. And then there’s Mervyn, the lawn merkin. That will be a fun one to explain to Scout.
And he still mows. I swear he’s mowed over the yard four times now.
Judging by Peter’s “dad drive” I feel pretty confident that I will not have it- at least not about my yard. I do think I will have it for other things. What? I don’t know yet- hopefully playing with my child, doing laundry, and vacuuming. Kylie would love it if my “dad drive” included picking up my piles of clothes and a lost interest in collecting weird stuff. I assume my “dad drive” is within me somewhere just waiting to be triggered. When will it be triggered, I don’t know. Will it be early when Kylie starts showing? Will it be when I first meet Scout? Will it just happen when I just have to have it happen? Or maybe it will evolve, just like my routine will, when it has to.